A Walk Through a Cemetery Unleashes The Power of Positive Thinking
Most people I know are familiar with the phrase “the power of positive thinking.”
When I first heard those words, I imagined thought bubbles (yes, like in the comic strips) draped in brightly colored superhero capes soaring around my head and making me invincible. It was a happy thought, one you might expect from a 12-year-old girl with a vivid imagination.
Time and life have taught me that wasn’t exactly what Dr. Norman Vincent Peale had in mind when he penned those words and introduced the concept in the early 1950s. But the image still makes me happy.
A Story for You
Years ago, I found myself in a car with friends exploring Long Island, New York.
On a remote stretch of a tree-lined county road, we saw the remains of a cemetery overlooking fields as far as the eye could see. Not being fond of the subject of death, we bounced around the idea of just driving on; but in that perfect autumn light, we decided to stop.
Out of the car, we pushed open the rusted gate and slowly moved among the tombstones; some standing, some leaning and some toppled from years of neglect. Names and dates, etched into the stone, jumped out at me. Men, women, and the occasional child had been laid to rest in this picturesque location, but as I read the dates of birth and death, I realized the relative youth of the adults memorialized by the stone markers. Most, it seemed, were barely 40 years old.
I found myself back in the car with my friends, heading north on that same county road but unable to shake a sad, helpless feeling pressing on my mind. Seeing the relatively short lives of those buried in that country cemetery made me feel uncertain about the purpose of my life. “Have I accomplished enough? Will I ever accomplish enough?” These were the questions ringing in my ears.
As we drove, I reached a conclusion. I latched onto a phrase I’d heard but never really understood. The phrase “the power of positive thinking” challenged me to take control of the situation and, rather than continue to feel small and powerless over these random thoughts, to take action that would shape my reality for years to come.
What I Learned from a Walk Through a Cemetery
When I got home to Philadelphia, I jotted down a list of actions. It went like this:
- I will be more loving to myself. Rather than beat myself up over things I’ve done or imagined, I will create a more loving, gentle relationship with myself.
- I will be more loving to the people in my life who matter the most. Family and friends come to mind here. These are the people who love me the most, often despite myself. They’ve stood with me for over 40 years and, for the most part, I’ve taken their love for granted. I will actively look for ways to love and care for my friends and family, starting today.
- I will not be driven solely by my work. While I love my work, my work has begun to define me. I need to develop other interests that offer me opportunities to experience new people, places, and things without a camera around my neck or business cards in my hands. Call it work/life balance, call it whatever you please, but I need to better connect to the joy of living beyond the confines of making a living.
- I will take more risks, try new things, expand my circle of experiences. Turns out that life is short, and I want to make the most of every day. Rather than becoming “safer,” I want my forties and beyond to be filled with bigger, more exciting adventures.
- I will live my own dreams. I spend too much time concerned with what people will think about me or a decision I’ve made. The decisions I make are no one’s business but my own. I want to live in that reality every single day and learn to trust myself.
- I will care more for others. For too long, I’ve walked through my days only focused on my life, my needs, and my concerns. If it’s true that giving is the best reward, then I need to find out for myself. I will look for ways I can positively impact my community.
- I will take better care of myself. While I do a decent job of eating right and exercising, I’d like to up my game in these areas. If I’m going to learn to care for others, I’d better start at home by caring for myself.
- I will discover what joy and happiness look like for me. Too many people I know are unhappy; I don’t want that for my life. Even if it means radical changes, I’m on a new path towards joy and happiness.
A Final Thought
When I look at this list today, I smile. Where had these thoughts come from and why? At the end of the day, it doesn’t really matter where they came from. What matters is that rather than succumbing to the negative energy spinning in my head, I decided to harness the power of positive thinking and, in doing so, I’d charted a new course for my life.
Seems like the work of some colorfully-caped superhero thoughts to me, don’t you think?
